Day 359 / Time to Step Back?

It is coming up on a year when I found my neighbor, Miss D in neglect. I didn’t realize until now how I have become a numbers person recording and counting the days and visits – hence my timeline above for Miss D. It was my 50th visit with Miss D at her secured location yesterday and I was introduced to one of the social workers of her newly appointed guardian group.

Was it the first day of getting Miss D back home? Maybe. What if the guardian group can’t get 24-hour care in her home? What if it’s only 12 hours? Can Miss D be on her own overnight? This all has to be worked out and the guardian group can’t say with certainty how long this process may take. I’ve even thrown my name into the mix as a possible caretaker on a shift to ease Miss D’s transition back home. As a non-family member, my involvement has always been unclear. Do I step back now?

Ever since Miss D was taken out of her home by APS, I’ve felt responsible. My husband comforts me and says Miss D would have been homeless or dead from a fire or possibly put others at risk in our apartment building. Although, I know he is right, will this terrible feeling ever go away if Miss D does not get back home?

Does my counting bring me the control I don’t have?